2017 Entry 3: Lost in Thought

I haven’t written for a long time here. Ugh, blame my busy life. I promise swear I’ll try to post more often when I am on my vacation.

Okay, so this poem has been in my documents folder for a while now, and I have decided to make something out of randomly-generated words. The words are in bold.

How random must I free-write eh?


Everything feels so unsure,

Like a hymn not memorized

Some try to reassure

Me

That everything is organized

But no, it is not

It is bad, my blood is leaking

Being blown away on a helicopter’s landing

My heart feels sabotaged, kidnapped

By the terrorists of romance

Threatening me that they will explode

Wreck me into pieces and so,

Love will kill me again

Disintegrate my soul

Shut down my brain

Like someone who has lost his feet

On a ballroom floor

Toppling around, carrying her weight in your shoulders

Falling down

Falling in love

Falling in the abyss that is depression

Why does love feel like this?

I’m numb,

I can’t move,

My body feels like it is on paralysis

Never getting to homeostasis

I am not balanced anymore

Intoxicated by the thought of you loving me

It is like a virus interfering with my thoughts

Making me so naïve, why am I naïve?

To think that you will re-appear, will appear like the ghost of my dreams

The specter of my past, the shadow that lurks around the “what-ifs”,

The eyes of a ghoul, staring at me, goes down for a demented kiss.

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